Here's To Good Friends, Tonight Is Kind Of Special

I took Monday off and spent the day and night out of town with some friends of mine from Marble. It's so great having relationships with people where even though you don't see them every day (or, like in this case, more then once a year) when you are together you can just pick up right where you left off as if no time had passed.

These are my favorite friendships. They are so natural and easy and enjoyable. Having good company and good conversation, well, there's nothing better. I was away from home, away from work, in a beautiful, natural setting just relaxing and having a good time.

Did I mention it was rainy and wet? And we were out in the middle of nowhere? But that just made it all the more fun. There was lots of laughing, let me tell you. Wouldn't it be nice if every day could be like that?

When it is like that I just revel in it. I focus on what I am doing and who I am with. Nothing else matters but that time and place. And then, when I do go back to the day-to-day, I feel relaxed, at peace, ready to face whatever comes my way.

Ahhh. Good friends....the key to sanity.

For the Record of the Day:

The beer we drank was Mount St. Helena. Not Lowenbrau.

Deep Breathing Helps

"Is it too much to ask for a stress free existence?"

That was the first line of my horoscope today. Then it went on to tell me, "no. But now may not be the best time to ask for it." I decided to ignore that second part.

Instead, I thought to myself, to whom would I even be asking this question? Who has the power to reduce the amount of stress in my life?

Oh, yeah. Me.

See, this is the trick. We can't control what happens to us as a result of other forces. We can only control how we act and react. And our actions and reactions are what causes stress. Right?

Sometimes it's involuntary. Having an automobile accident. And sometimes it's voluntary. Taking on too many commitments at work and not having enough time to reasonably fulfill them all. Either way, it's all about us.

Now I am not saying that reducing or eliminating the stress in our lives is easy. Just that the power to do so only lies within ourselves.

So, today I am going to ask myself for a stress free existence by doing my best to eliminate the stress in my life. Hmmm. Seems paradoxical. But it just might work!

Funny Paradoxical Statement of the Day:

Nobody goes to that restaurant, it's too crowded.

It's Not Self-Satisfaction, It's Contentment

Have you ever had one of those days where you just feel good about Being? I'm having one today and it's darn nice, I must say.

It's not like my day's work was particularly exciting or meaningful. To be frank, it was actually quite tedious. A project that was boring and time consuming but desperately needed doing. And it wasn't even for myself, it was for someone else (who paid me to do it, I might add). But I suppose getting it done brought about a certain level of satisfaction.

I dunno. I've just been feeling pretty satisfied overall these days. I think it began in earnest last Friday after successfully installing "Flower Spiral" at the 580 Hayes Elder Art Park (that's the official name, I found out). Check out these photos:

Eric and James were a fantastic installation crew; total Rock Stars! So, I was feeling pretty great when all was said and done. Multiple people passing by inquired about the sculpture and the new art park. Some even took pictures!

But, you know, that's just one thing. Everything is feeling pretty right, right now. I'm not stressed about the fact that I still don't have the time or energy to work on my art (thankfully, that's going to change after the first of next month) or even have a clear picture about what that art may be (although I do have ideas rumbling around in my head). The sunny days are probably helping.  But really, Everything is A-Okay.

A co-worker of mine at the warehouse has a fondness for uttering the phrase: Are we having fun yet? Lately my answer has been: Always!

My Favorite Buddhist Chant of the Day:

May all beings be at ease.

And, I might add...

May you be well.
May you be peaceful.
May you be happy.

Get Off That Plus-Size Chair, A Study Says You Need More Exercise!

I love to cook, I love to eat and I love to exercise. Which is a good thing because the more I eat (which is usually a lot, especially on the weekends) the more I need to exercise in order to maintain my healthy weight.

I am a regular Gym Rat. You know the type: lifting weights every week, front row at the same spin or kick-boxing class, knows all the gym staff by name. I really like my daily regime. And that makes it quite easy for me to stay slim.

But I am not normal if today's paper is any indication. And, no, this is not some in-depth research report. It's just a fluffy blog post idea formed in the span of about five minutes, okay? Here are two articles that caught my eye.

"Plus-Size Furniture Grows With Girth"

We are a nation of large people, growing larger, and we want our Barcaloungers to get bigger along with us. So, now furniture manufacturers are doing just that, making over-sized furniture that can handle our weight. Great, another incentive to not get off of our collective asses and take a walk around the block after dinner. So Sad.

And then, just to get you more frustrated about the futility of not gaining weight as we age, there is this article.

"Women Found to Need More Workouts to Fight Fat"

Turns out we need at least an hour a day of moderate activity (more, if you are trying to lose weight) to maintain a healthy weight. Um, really? This is something we didn't know before, needed a study to tell us?

But apparently, for a lot of people, this much exercise is A Lot. According to the article, few overweight women get that much exercise. Probably they are frustrated that it takes that much effort in the first place so they give up and just lounge in their over-sized recliner and watch "Dancing With the Stars" instead of walking briskly, leisurely bicycling or golfing (all moderate forms of exercise, according to the article.)

Man, I'm glad I'm not the "average". It keeps me healthy and in shape and I don't even feel like I'm trying. I mean, an hour a day is kind of the minimum for me. When I go for a hike, for instance, anything under an hour feels like I finished before I started. I've barely gotten my endorphins flowing, you know?

Well, I gotta go ride my bike to the gym now. See ya!

Brilliant Letter to the Editor of the Day:

Culled from today's San Francisco Chronicle.

The reported cost of changing signage on Third Street and Highway 101 is approximately $200,000, according to the Chronicle.

This total does not include the cost and disruption to businesses and residents of Third Street, who likely will have to change business cards, stationary, signs, etc.

Given the difficult economic times, I respectfully suggest that the best and most cost-effective solution is for Willie Brown to rename himself "Third Street."

--Marc Tarrasch, Los Altos

Yes!

Losing Integrity In The Digital Era

I'm not even 40 and yet I'm beginning to feel like a relic. For instance, I'm not crazy about digital music; I like to buy CDs, call them albums, even. I still have a turntable! And often play LPs!

And I like print journalism. I read the newspaper, that is delivered to my driveway, every morning. I do not like to read the news on my computer monitor or phone display screen (actually, I'm so behind the times I don't even have a phone that allows me to do that easily). The physical newspaper is a dying breed and I'm trying to protect it as best I can by not canceling my subscription.

My biggest quibble with technology changing the way we distribute information is that it is making us sloppy. It seems, as a society, we are no longer conscientious about writing anymore. Even when I read the newspaper I find typographical errors Every Single Day. Where are the editors? Laid off, I guess, because subscriptions are down and we've gotta cut costs somewhere and no one cares these days if a word is spelled wrong or syntax is incorrect or punctuation is improper.

It all started with email. That's when we became lazy. I'll just send a quick note to this person or that, type it really fast, no time to proofread, don't even bother to capitalize, they'll understand what I mean. But at least with email there is a spell check feature to capture misspellings at the last minute.

But now with text messaging and IMs and blogs and status updates and tweets and comments we try to say what we mean as fast as we can using as few characters as possible - 'cause, you know, those little phone keyboards make typing difficult.

Do they even still teach typing in school? I guess it'd be called keyboarding now but I suppose it would be more relevant to teach texting these days.

It's a shame, really. Remember writing letters to pen pals? You'd take your time, phrase things just right, write pages and pages updating your friend about this and that, trying very hard to make it a good read. Now, no one thinks twice, much less proofreads once, before hitting the "send" button.

I generally write complete sentences when I text. I read my blog posts at least twice before I publish them. And then re-read them to find anything else I may have missed. I even look over with care the clever and witty comments I make on Facebook. Why? Because I have integrity. I know how to use the English language correctly (and incorrectly, when I want to, for affect). It matters to me that my writing is proper. Even in the Internet Age, why be so lazy and sloppy?

"Ewwww!" Moment of the Day:

From Leah Garchik's column on the Back Page of the Datebook section of today's Chronicle:

Laurel Carney was hanging out in front of Copperfield's in Petaluma the other day when Eddie Murphy came by. After asking whether she was older than 21 (yes), he pulled out $6, handed it to her and told her to buy herself a drink.

Skeevy!!

Kitty Gordon, Unplugged

This weekend I participated in the National Day of Unplugging. From sundown, Friday March 19th to sundown, Saturday March 20th, I, more or less, followed the Ten Principles, as put forth by the Sabbath Manifesto which are:

1. Avoid Technology
2. Connect With Loved Ones
3. Nurture Your Health
4. Get Outside
5. Avoid Commerce
6. Light Candles
7. Drink Wine
8. Eat Bread
9. Find Silence
10. Give Back

Avoiding Technology was the most difficult, especially during the day on Saturday. I spent most of the afternoon outside cleaning up my backyard and then, later, figuring out what kind of dinner I could make using up all of the random ingredients in my fridge. Spring Cleaning, indeed!

But, throughout, I was constantly tempted to check my email. Usually my computer is always one with my email account up on the screen, continually updated. Checking to see if I have any new messages is very easy. That day, however, I had turned my computer off on purpose.

It was crazy the number of times I popped into my office only to be reminded that I was "avoiding technology". Just what did I think would be waiting for me in my Inbox that I had to keep interrupting my day so frequently? I'm sure I do this all the time and not even realize it.

You know, I don't even have a smart phone and I found this 24-hour sabbath a challenge. I wonder what it would have been like for people who have trouble putting down their Blackberry or iPhone? We really are a society that can't "unplug". It's funny to me that a group would even think to initiate a project that encourages people to take a break from their constant distractions, live more simply, just breath. For some reason we can't think to do this on our own. Humans are very strange animals.

SNL or Mad TV Sketch Idea of the Day:

Amish Text Messaging.

Okay, so there is this Amish guy and he's sitting at a writing desk writing a note that says, "leaving now, be there in 15 minutes." He puts the paper in an envelope, addresses it, stamps it, takes it to the mail box and then heads out on his horse. He arrives at the market, or some other kind of meeting place, and stands there and waits and waits, becoming more and more impatient until he finally leaves in frustration. Three days later a letter arrives in the mailbox of another Amish dude. He reads the note, smiles, and goes to the same place where the first guy had been waiting. No one is there and so he leaves in confusion.

Do you get it? That's funny, right?

Fun Is Where The Mess Is

My home office is by no means a disaster but it certainly is not what I would consider neat and tidy. Generally, there is some assortment of "I'll get to it"s and "Don't forget about"s and "Just put away already"s cluttering my computer desk and my drawing table. In fact, most of the time my drawing table is not conducive to actual drawing because it's got crap piled on top of it. And then there is all of the random art this and that stacked everywhere else. I bit messy, for sure.

But that's okay. I kind of like it that way. Makes me feel like I got Stuff Goin' On. Things are Happening, ya know? I think the good stuff is usually found in the messes. You gotta dig for it. Keep things too clean on the surface and what have you got? A space that you don't want to mess up, that's what! And what's the fun in having that?

Awesome Live Music Performance of the Day:

Groove Armada.

I saw them play the Fillmore last night. Wow! What a show. It was one of the most amazing live music performances I have seen in a very long time. I had a blast.

Second show tonight at 9pm. I highly recommend it.

Sunny Day Sweeping The Clouds Away

Hee Hee Hee! The nice weather has gotten me all shiny and happy. What can I say? I love, love, love the Sun!

I'm extra super happy that it's gonna be even nicer tomorrow because that is when I will be installing Flower Spiral in San Francisco. Setting up art in foul weather sucks big time. Just ask anyone who's made art for Burning Man.

My first public art in the city of San Francisco. Feels pretty good but it's going to feel even better when the sculpture is in place. I sure hope folks enjoy this latest addition of art in the neighborhood.

Anyway, if you happen to be near Hayes and Laguna Streets tomorrow afternoon, come on by and say "hi". Or lend a hand.

Stylin' Music Video of the Day:

Gorillaz's "Stylo" featuring Bruce Willis.


Gorillaz - Stylo from mario ucci on Vimeo.

Let's hear it for Bruce Willis staying high on the Cool-o-Meter.

Just Do It

I have no idea what I am doing. But I do know that I can no longer let that keep me from...Doing.

So often in my life I let my uncertainty cause inaction. What's the purpose? What's the plan? What's gonna happen? It's like I need to know all of the details before I can allow myself to begin anything.

But here's the thing. It's not always about the details. Sometimes, most of the time, you've just got to dive in and sort the details out as you go along. See what happens As It's Happening.

Wow. Cool idea.

So. That is my new "plan". No Plan. I'm just gonna start doing stuff. Whatever I feel like. And see where it takes me. But I refuse to sit around any more trying to figure out what I'm going to do next. This is next. I'm Doing It.

Day One of No Caffeine Update of the Day:

Yesterday I felt Great! No Coffee; No Problems.

Not Meant To Be

About 12 or 13 years ago I decided to give up caffeine. I was having trouble sleeping and it seemed liked a good idea at the time. In any case, it couldn't hurt. I was surprised at how easy a thing it was to do. Sometimes I felt like a weird-o when someone offered me a cup of coffee and I declined. But for the most part I didn't miss it at all.

Then, last summer, I decided to let caffeine back into my life. Eric makes a fantastic espresso and so I would enjoy one, single espresso, preferably before 9am, every morning. And that was it.

It felt good to have caffeine back in my life. We got along great. It didn't affect my sleep patterns at all. Such a yummy, good morning treat. It was like we'd never parted ways.

Then I started working full-time again, at an office where coffee is consumed all day long, the pot rarely empty. So, I'd have a cup when I got in (this was after my usual single espresso). And, occasionally, I might have another.

I'd keep my caffeine consumption to before noon. But, still. I was consuming more then I had in over a decade. I started to feel not quite right.

I am not sure if my recent feelings of anxiety or uncertainty have anything to do with my drinking coffee. But I've decided that I need to go back to my teetotaller-ish ways in regards to caffeine, just to see if that helps ease my discomfort.

I think the truth is, me and caffeine were never really meant to be, as much as I wish it were so. But you know what they say, just because you want something to be true doesn't mean it is.

So, Bye Bye Caffeine. Sorry, it didn't work out. It was fun while it lasted.

Favorite Song By a Band of Cartoons of the Day:

"Superfast Jellyfish" by Gorillaz. It makes me happy every time I listen to it!

Last Night I Had The Strangest Dream

Last night I had a dream that it was the end of the year and I didn't have any recollection of the experiences that I had between now and then. I was so upset. It was a relief to wake up and realize it was still the middle of March and that I hadn't missed a thing.

This makes me realize just how important it is to me that I be present in my life. I'm not here on this planet just to wait out the hours; I am here to fully experience being ME. Whatever that may be. All of the good and all of the bad, I don't want to miss any of it. Life is weird and scary and interesting and boring and stressful and fun and exciting. What a shame it would be to not want to have all of that.

I have no idea what is going to happen to me between now and tomorrow or now and next month or now and next year or now and..... Well, you get the idea. And sometimes I am so not okay with that it makes me want to crawl into bed and say, "wake me when it's over."

But, nope. I can't sleep through my life, that's silly. Lately I've been feeling very unsettled, directionless and unsure of myself. But maybe spending some time in such a space will put me on a path to something amazing that I can't even comprehend.

Hmmm. If this rambling, mildly incoherent blog post is any indication of my state of mind maybe just rolling with it is not such a bad idea. Instead having it all figured out all of the time, perhaps I can finally start to just enjoy the ride.

What a nice thought.

Question of the Day:

At what point should I accept the fact that I am not in control of this ride?

Get Over It!

After weeks of waiting and wondering, I finally found out yesterday that my art installation was not selected by Burning Man for funding this year.

[deep breath]

Okay, I've been down this road before. I can handle it. Rejection comes with being an artist. It's part of the package. I get rejected all of the time and It's Okay. Really. It makes the times when I am selected (and that happens plenty, too) that much sweeter. No pleasure without pain, right?

Except for some reason it always hurts more when it's Burning Man telling me "no". Which is odd because it's not like Burning Man is more important then any other art opportunity. Some would even say it's less because there is inherently a limited audience. There is a whole part of the art world that gives absolutely no credence to this event at all. Flower Spiral being installed at the new Hayes Street art park is way more mainstream and is going to give me much more meaningful exposure in the long run.

But I think it hurts so much because I have an emotional connection not only to the Burning Man event but to all of the people involved. I've given a great deal of myself and my time to Burning Man the last three years and I've gotten back quite a lot in return (opportunities, appreciation, acceptance, friendship). The challenges and hard work have been well worth it, in my opinion.

Last year when Bottle Cap Bar didn't get funding I was deeply disappointed. More so then this year, actually. But in hindsight it was for the best. I am absolutely certain that installation would have failed. There were many design flaws. And I would have been miserable making it. Especially because, at the time, I was not in a proper emotional space to tackle such a challenge. Rejection forced me to rethink my idea and come up with something that was way more appropriate for me and the event. And I was much, much happier then I ever would have been had I committed to making my original idea.

The only monkey wrench was that I paid for that project myself. And that hurt. Not just financially but emotionally. I mean, I want people to believe in me. Believe in my ideas and my talent. And I want them to believe enough to want to Give Me Money so that I can more easily achieve my goals, make my dreams a reality, see my visions come true.

Anyone can make art for Burning Man. No one will ever be turned away. Except I don't want to be Anyone! I want to be Kitty Gordon, Funded Artist. I want the Honor! I want the Glory! I want the Bragging Rights! I want the Money! Is that so wrong?

Lame Movie Sequel Title of the Day:

"Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps."

Seriously? "Wall Street 2: Wall Streeter" would have been a better title!

The Wait Should Be Over Today

Right now, that's all I've got to say.

Okay, I'll Say This One More Thing of the Day:

No matter what happens, no matter what the decision is, "yes" or "no", My Life Is Good!

Oh, Nerds!

I was all set to write about the unexpected experience that I had yesterday with a salesman who had The Most over-bearing and annoying personality that I have ever encountered In My Life. It. Was. Awful.

I'm sure I would have sprinkled the story with a healthy combination of wit and insight ultimately coming to the oh, so original conclusion that human beings are strange and complicated characters and the ways that we interact with people is all unique and different. But then I was reading Vogue at the gym this morning (Yes, I know that I've barely begun "Lake Wobegon Days" but Tina Fey was on the cover! C'mon!) so I've decided to write about that instead.

After two or three minutes looking for the table of contents (jesus, that magazine must weigh, like, five pounds for all of the fashion ads) and then another couple of minutes trying to find the right page (more page numbers wouldn't hurt) I finally was able to read the Tina Fey Cover Story. As you might imagine, considering this was Vogue Magazine, it was all about her sense of fashion (and occasional lack-of). But it was a great read anyway. 'Cause, you know, it was Tina Fey!

Women like me love Tina Fey because she is One of Us. She's smart, witty, sarcastic, current and pretty. But she's also self-deprecating, goofy, kind, nerdy and approachable. She's very successful and we can relate to her. It's a nice combination.

She was drop dead funny as Sarah Palin on SNL and 30 Rock is one of the very best shows on television right now. Alec Baldwin is amazing as Jack Donaghy and it's mostly because Tina Fey and her team of writers are the ones responsible for the words that come out of his mouth.

Anyway, it's really refreshing to see a fellow nerd do so well and still be a nerd. I think I may just have a girl crush on her!

Movie Trailer of the Day:

TRON: LEGACY - Official Trailer

I cannot BELIEVE that I have to wait until December to see this movie!

Laughs Abound on the Internet

I don't have anything interesting or profound or current or relevant to write about today but I like this habit I've gotten into where I post to my blog every morning before going to work. So, here's a YouTube video of William Shatner reading stuff from @ShitMyDadSays that is freakin' hilarious. If you haven't stumbled upon this already, Enjoy!



Oh Yeah, and This is Pretty Funny, Too of the Day:

Funny or Die's Presidential Reunion.

Children Are Strange Animals

It was such a beautiful day here in the Bay Area yesterday. As Eric put it, "If you're not outside today you better be deeeaaaad or in jaaaaaaiiiil! Or at work.....in jaaaaaiiiiil!"

So, given that I wasn't dead. Or in jail. Or working in jail, I was outside. And it was awesome. Eric and I adventured around in Central Marin for most of the afternoon. And while we were out and about I witnessed two instances of odd behavior in children. Odd enough that it caused me to ponder: Where do they get this?

The first occurred outside a local grocery store. Two young boys, obviously brothers, were leaving the store with their parent. The younger boy was running after the older one crying "give me back the cheese puffs!" He was in obvious distress. This was terrible for him that he may never again get to be the holder of the bag of cheese puffs or, worse still, his brother may get More Than He Does!

What makes kids so greedy like that? It's obviously fear-based (not having enough). But it's definitely not linked to equity (making sure everyone gets their fair share) because I am sure that little kid would be more then happy to cut his big brother off completely once he got his hands on the goods.

Then their was the "little match boy" we encountered in a tchotchkes shop later on. To say that this kid was odd would be an understatement. I'm thinking therapy may be in order. He was standing near us saying, "oh, if only someone would give me two dollars." What?!? There was an ice cream store next door so I figure he was begging cash so he could get a cone. But, really, how did he expect this to work?

I thought Eric's dismissive "don't look at me" would be enough to brush him off. But, nope. A few minutes later, in another part of the store, there he was again. "This is terrible," he moaned. "If only someone would give me a dollar!" I guess he figured he'd see if we'd cave in for less money.

No matter how much we ignored him he kept at it, following us around the store. What a creep. Where the hell were his parents? Why wasn't he bugging the shit out of them instead of us? Finally, we left, definitely perplexed and, I will admit, a little bit amused. You don't run across something like that very often.

I couldn't help but wonder, again, where does this stem from? Are we, as humans, born this way or is it learned behavior? No matter what, both kids were absolutely miserable. Greed and desperation do not make people, even ones under the age of ten, happy at all. Just.....pathetic. And odd.

"And Another Thing...." of the Day:

What's up with Rock and Roll conceit?

I was on an LP kick this weekend, playing some fave concept albums from the 70s and 80s while doing household chores. Listening to Styx's "Mr. Roboto" I couldn't help but wonder, why it is that so many rock musicians think that the music they make is so evil and affecting and outrageous and unheard-of that Some Day, in the Future, it will be Banned? And that they, the unsung Hero, must record an entire album about that thus showing the world that they are Outlaws just for Rocking!

Weird. But, oh my gosh, I just love "Mr. Roboto". "Don't Let It End" is such an awesome song! C'mon...admit it...you love it, too.

Confidence is Key

Things are going really well at my new job just as I knew they would. I've gotten to the point in my life where I am very aware of my ability to "get shit done". I'm intelligent, I'm reliable, I'm personable and I'm confident. When it comes to working for people, I know that they will not be sorry they hired me. Always.

I am successful in the workplace mostly because I know that I am a successful person.

So. Why am I unable to apply this to my work as an artist? Why do I still doubt myself and my abilities? People like my art. They tell me that. A lot. They consider me a successful artist. So why don't I feel it?

Here's the latest. I was contacted this week by someone from the Hayes Valley Art Coalition. He wanted to know if Flower Spiral would be available for install this month at a new art park that is being constructed at Hayes and Laguna Streets in San Francisco. The sculpture would be up for three months. I said, Yes, of course! My first public art installation in the City. How Exciting!

And then came the questions. Wait. Are they sure? This must be some kind of mistake. Why me?

I was told that this sculpture was perfect for the location, it fits the footprint exactly, that they Love It. And this was just by looking at pictures on my website which admittedly aren't that great. It looks even better in real life. So, what's with all the self-doubt, right?

I was also told that the original sculpture that they wanted for that spot, by the well-known Burning Man artist Michael Christian, won't be available until August. So, in comes me, at the last minute, to the rescue. Not first choice but, still, a choice.

I mean, they approached me. I had no idea this art park even existed. I should be so incredibly flattered. I am, actually. And yet I fear.

I fear they'll see my work and think: God, what an amateur. This chick has no idea what she's doing!

Okay, Kitty, enough!

What is it going to take for me to see that I do know what I am doing? That I am not an amateur? They asked me for a reason and the reason is: I make cool art. Cool art that the public is going to get to see and experience. That should be enough to put the little voice of doubt in my head to rest, right?

I'll let you know how that goes.

Movie I Hope is Better Than the Review in the San Francisco Chronicle Would Have Me Believe of the Day:

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland.

Stuff I Got Goin' On

Here are upcoming opportunities to see my art in public:

BURNAL EQUINOX
Saturday, March 6, 2010
8:00pm - 3:30am

See Wheel Weed on display!

Space 550
550 Barneveld
San Francisco, CA 94124

$15 in Playa finery or with donation of 3 or more boxes/cans food;
$20 in street clothes
Four rooms of art and performance + an outdoor art lounge area
21+ older

MSA OPEN CRAFT & SCULPTURE
March 7 - March 28, 2010
Reception: Sunday March 7, 2010
2:00pm - 4:00pm

See Spinning Sun Flower on display!

Marin Art and Garden Center
30 Sir Francis Drake Blvd.
Ross, CA 94957

Gallery Hours:
Mon-Thu 11am-4pm
Weekends noon-4pm

ART PARK AT 580 HAYES
April - July, 2010

See Flower Spiral on display!

580 Hayes Street (at Laguna)
San Francisco, CA 94102

Day Off Not a Day Off of the Day:

Power out at American Steel all day due to PG&E work.

What better way to spend a forced day off then working on art applications, sculpture prep and self-promotion. A day of rest? Perhaps on Sunday.....

Art and Fear

I love the book "Art and Fear" by David Bayles and Ted Orland. I read it when I am feeling particularly vulnerable and tempted to quit making art. The book helps me realize that these fears are common among all creative types and often inspires me to carry on.

Chapter Two, titled "Art and Fear", especially affects me. In it the authors discuss how easy and common it is for artists to stop making art, never to start again. In fact, only Two Percent of art school graduates even continue making art after graduation.

Many factors cause this. A big one is suddenly losing your peer group (fellow students and teachers) and purpose (class assignments and student shows). But also, time is a factor. Working full-time, after a hard day of doing whatever it takes to pay the bills, it's hard to have the energy or motivation to go to the studio rather then home and bed.

I am experiencing that right now. I am so tired at the end of the work day, I really don't want to put in two or three more hours making art. I have less focus and presence. It's difficult for me to concentrate.

I've been lucky so far that circumstances in my life have made it easier for me to persevere, to keep going. But now, I can relate to the other ninety-eight percent a lot better.

I'm hopeful this is just temporary while I continue getting used to my new work situation. I won't quit art; I'm certain of that. But I think I may need to stop for a bit - at least until I find out what I'm going to be doing for Burning Man this year (it will be another two weeks before decisions are announced).

Maybe what I need is a two week break. Don't worry about my art practice for a while and just focus on my new job. Make some money and concentrate on other tasks. It may just be what I need to take me to the next level. Who knows!

Quote of the Day:

Artists don't get down to work until the pain of working is exceeded by the pain on not working. -- Stephen DeStaebler

Why I Do What I Do

I want to follow up on yesterday's post wherein I pondered: Why Do I Do What I Do?

So, I dropped off my bottle cap sculptures for the juried show. And you've got to understand, this is an open Craft and Sculpture exhibition so there are a lot of artists who enter work of pretty traditional mediums. I've been in this annual art show four times previous. Once was a ceramic sculpture of a female reclining nude (from my student days); twice were abstract stone carvings (where I won first and third places); and last year I displayed Bicycle Wheel and Bottle Caps. Each year my submissions are getting more and more "unusual".

My bottle cap art got a lot of interesting looks as I hauled it out of my truck yesterday morning. I was reassembling Spinning Sun Flower outside the gallery and a women coming out of the building saw my work and was briefly startled. She proclaimed, "your art must be a pain to transport." I had to concede, that yes, indeed, it's a pain in the ass and I admitted to her that on numerous occasions I've questioned why I do this in the first place. She just shrugged and said, "I work with textiles....."

And at that moment it was so clear to me that I couldn't be doing anything else. There is no way that I will ever stop making these weird, difficult to construct, complicated to transport, and hard to explain sculptures of mine. It's What I Do!

On the one hand, I'd love for my art to just be plain Easier. But, I know in my heart that in the end I'd find that Boring! So, I'm going to keep on doing my thing and let someone else be the quilt-maker or the pot-thrower or the basket-weaver or whatever. I am the Bottle Cap Art-Maker. There is no other way around it.

Latin Phrase of the Day:

Sumus quod sumus.

We are what we are.

Why Do I Do What I Do?

This morning, before I go to work, I am dropping off two of my recent bottle cap sculptures (Spinning Sun Flower and Lily) for consideration in a local juried sculpture exhibition. And as I was loading up my truck last Friday night, part of Spinning Sun Flower sticking out the back even after I had dismantled it, I thought to myself: Why Do I Do This?

Why do I enjoy making art that is awkward and, occasionally, unstable? Too big to carry easily or fit into one's vehicle? Made of materials that most would consider to be trash? Why can't I just paint? Or make pottery? That would be a whole hell of a lot easier to make, to transport, to display, to sell.

Just what, exactly, is my deal?

But I can't help it. This is what I feel driven to do. These weird sculptures make me happy, even when I am struggling to put them together, to make them exist.

I haven't heard yet from Burning Man regarding my art grant proposal. So I still don't know if I will get funding to make a large art installation this year. I should know any second now. To be frank, I could go either way. I really, really want to do it but I know that with that will come a lot of work, struggle, frustration, and tears (in addition to the pride, joy, satisfaction and fun).

Displaying art on the playa is not easy, by any stretch. So, if they say "no" I won't be too broken up about it. I'll just move on to Plan "B". Or Plan "C". Or whatever. It's all good. I'll be doing something art-related there. Despite the challenges, I do love making art for Burning Man.

You know, my life could be a lot easier if I wanted it to be. My reasons for becoming an artist, for making the art that I make, are often beyond my comprehension. What compels us to do anything, really? If anyone has an answer for that I am all ears.

Answer of the Day:

Booty.